Responsibility or Dependability?
Responsibility vs Dependability: How to Find the Right Balance
Responsibility to yourself. Dependability to others.
Both are essential—but balancing them is one of the biggest challenges in today’s evolving work culture.
It is a key skill that is required not just for managing personal well-being, but also for building truly sustainable, high-performing teams.
Responsibility: It Starts With You
Responsibility to yourself means taking ownership of your needs, goals, and well-being. It’s about self-awareness: understanding what helps you thrive—mentally, physically, and emotionally—and making sure you prioritise those things.
It's about knowing what you need to thrive. Not just to get by, but to be in the best possible place to do your best work.
This is more than just common sense. According to Deci and Ryan’s Self-Determination Theory (1985), meeting basic psychological needs for autonomy, competence, and connection is crucial for motivation, creativity, and resilience. Neglecting your own needs doesn’t make you stronger; it steadily drains your ability to perform and engage.
Dependability: Being There for Others
Dependability is equally important. It’s about being the person others can rely on: consistently delivering on your commitments, meeting deadlines, and supporting colleagues when needed.
Dependability builds trust. It is proven that employees seen as dependable are more likely to be promoted and trusted with leadership responsibilities.
However, problems arise when dependability to others comes at the expense of responsibility to yourself. When that happens, burnout isn't far behind—and both your well-being and your performance start to suffer.
Burnout: A Real Risk
Burnout is more than just feeling tired or overwhelmed, it stems from chronic overwork and a lack of time to recover.
People who consistently put others’ needs ahead of their own, often out of a desire to be seen as "helpful" or "reliable," are especially vulnerable. It is proven that employees who overextend themselves in the name of helping others experience more emotional exhaustion and role overload, ultimately becoming less effective at work.
Managing People-Pleasing Tendencies
If you’re someone who naturally wants to say “yes” to everything, you’re not alone. Many people struggle with people-pleasing—but without clear boundaries, it can quickly lead to stress, anxiety, and resentment.
Here are three ways to manage people-pleasing while maintaining strong relationships at work:
Pause before agreeing. Give yourself a moment to check your capacity before committing to new requests.
Prioritise selectively. Say yes to the things that align with your goals, values, and current workload, and don’t be afraid to say no when necessary.
Use “not right now.” Deferring a task when your plate is full is often better than rushing into something you can’t fully deliver.
Sustainable dependability means showing up when you truly can, not saying yes to everything and risking burnout.
Boundaries: The Key to Balancing Both Responsibility and Dependability
The secret to balancing responsibility and dependability is setting and maintaining clear boundaries. Boundaries help you protect your energy and time, ensuring you can consistently meet both your own needs and your commitments to others.
Research shows that employees who set and respect boundaries are not only more resilient but also more respected by their peers and managers. By setting realistic expectations, for yourself and for others, you create an environment of trust, clarity, and long-term success.
Responsibility and Dependability: Not Opposites, But Partners
It’s important to understand that when responsibility to yourself and dependability to others are not in conflict, they work together.
Responsibility means making sure you have the capacity and energy to do your best work.
Dependability means delivering on your promises in a way that’s sustainable over time.
When you balance the two, you don’t just protect your own well-being, you strengthen your relationships, your performance, and your resilience. A successful and sustainable Workstyle starts with caring for yourself, not sacrificing yourself.
If you’d like support helping your team find the right balance between personal responsibility and professional dependability, get in touch at lizzie@workstyle.org.uk. Together, we can build a healthier, more sustainable approach to work.
This blog was written by one of our team of volunteers, Poppy Tollemache, on behalf of the Workstyle Revolution.
